hair today.............

Today was the day I've been dreading........It has started falling out. My ears pricked up at the first chemo session when eavesdropping on a couple of ladies who were on their second trip. They both said that they had started to molt on the 3rd week. I have therefore let the days pass between hair washes as I've wanted to delay this moment. This morning, however, I HAD to do something about my lank, lifeless mop. I'm trying not to get too alarmed but it is still quite distressing to see more than the usual cluster swim toward the plug-hole. Eyebrows/lashes next? Trying not to cry!!!!

popville book

This looks like a wonderful pop-up book.
present&correct

gorgeous book

Thank you for this lovely book Mole. It's a really beautiful distraction.........

Nurse cheese

My lovely nurse Cheese and her trainee Cheese arrived at the weekend and cheered us all up. All the board games came out and it was a battle to win Cluedo. Miss Cheese came out as super sleuth.
Thank you SO much for clearing the ironing basket AGAIN. I don't know what I'd do without you. And a BIG thank you uncle Eeee for spoiling the cheeslets rotten.
Love you both xxxxx

package from India

I bought some antique sari fabric from India and I received THE most beautiful packaging in the post today.
It's so gorgeous I didn't want to open it.

Portmeirion jar

I found this little jar in the 'antique' shop down on Castle St.
It's from the Portmeirion pottery circa 1970 and I love it.
Oh how I wish I was in Portmeirion now..................

A big crush............

You can keep your Robbie's and your Ronan's, I have to say I've developed a BIG crush on Eddie Izzard, my hero (see Mr Cheese's blog) and an odd one on Sophie Dahl..........she was fabulous and beautiful on her new cooking programme last night.
Haven't quite got round to putting posters of them up on my bedroom wall, but there's time yet.

The wig

The lovely Mole took me to try my NHS wig on today. I was so apprehensive as it's not the easiest thing to go through. We were warmly greeted by Sabrina and led to the upstairs salon. The little room was full of those scary mannequin heads, sporting crops, flicks, curls and bobs.
Sabrina was very helpful, considerate and professional, thank goodness as I didn't want the tea and sympathy routine. I tried on a variety of blondes, brunettes and shaggy crops until I realised that she'd cleverly let me chose the one that she'd picked out for me right at the beginning.
I take ownership of the layered bob in chocolate brown next week. I'll definately have my mojo back!
A huge thank you Lizzie for your help and support, I couldn't have done it on my own or without you xxx

white(ish)

Lovely people

A huge thank you to all you lovely people for your kind words and lovely food.

Mrs Twelftree - for the mounds of magazines, they helped take my mind off things on monday x
Mrs Hunt - thank you for the lovely quiche. Mr Cheese had his regulation 2 portions x
Mrs Ineson - wonderful cookies. A massive thank you from the cheeselets (and as tasty as Tim's too) x
Mari the cake - Another wonderful creation of banana and chocolate. Mr Cheese can't wait to get his teeth into it x
Mrs Mills - for the wonderful relaxing spray and beautiful biscuits. Just lovely x
Mrs & Ms Russell - thank you both for your lovely cakes, fudge and magazines. Very very thoughtful of you x
Mme Ray - for my breakfast. Looking forward to the continental style x
** Oh and Mrs Littler - for the loan of her freezer to store the delicious spag bol that's coming my way when I'm up to eating solids again. And for the emergency grapes & lucozade! Thanks sweetheart x

And last but not least
Mr & Mrs Swinson - Oh how we miss you all. Can we move back?
Thank you both for filling our freezer with the most delicious food. It all looks amazing. Thank you (photos to follow..............)
xxxxx

The garden fairy

Blessed be old green-fingered Mrs Robertson. She came and raked and pruned and broomed the cheesie garden. Can't thank you enough Mrs R, it looks great. Praying for sunny weather so I can sit out and enjoy. You are lovely xxx

Easter

Something lovely from Donna Wilson

donna wilson

Chemo

It was all I could do not to cry out loud as I was given my bag of notes........there was NO turning back now. After the 'go-ahead' from the oncologist, we had a long 3 hour wait whilst they brewed my poison.
When I was called through to the treatment room I had to take several deep breaths as I could feel my heartbeat in my mouth. I chose a reclining chair near the sunny window and settled down for my 4 hour ordeal.
I chose to wear the ice cap for the first 3 treatments of FEC but won't bother wearing it for the 3 taxitere treatments as these are very toxic and nothing good will be saved. The ice cap is -4 degrees and was agony. I had to wear it for nearly 4 hours and was wrapped in a blanket to stay warm. When I removed it, my hair was brittle and full of icicles. I received 3 bags of chemo and a cocktail of anti-sickness drugs and steroids to lessen the effects of the toxic chemicals.
We got home at 6.30pm and I then threw up for Wales. No-one said it would happen so quickly. It was like the worst food poisoning I've ever had. Fat lot of good those anti-sickness pills were then!!!!!!! Am now sitting here waiting for the REAL feeling of sickness to kick in. Please, if there is a God, make it painless and quick!
One treatment down and 5 to go! The countdown to the beginning of July has begun....................

Thank you everyone for your lovely messages, it helps so much xxxxxx

The onion

This is it!
Nerys's Marvellous Medicine is to be administered. Let's hope it's fizztickling fun and a wizzpopping wheeze!!!
I'm absolutely terrified. Think calming thoughts and big deep breaths............
Thank you for all your well-wishes, it means so much to us.
x x x x x

hApPy mOtHErS dAy

to every lovely, hardworking, beautiful, amazing mother x

labpartners

The onion

I'm off to visit the 'chemo suite' at Mount Vernon this morning. I think it's so that I'll feel comfortable when the treatment starts on Monday. I'm REALLY REALLY scared about what's coming.
An awful feeling knowing that you'll willing take an armful of toxic poison to make you feel better is something I can't get my head around. I know I'll feel crap, but just how crap????

*
We went to the hospital for our tour and it was very informative. I felt close to tears as we walked into the room as it was a feeling of inevitability. This will be my life for the next few months. The chemo suite is brand spanking new and has comfy chairs and beds. When I go on Monday it will be an all day appointment. I'll have bloods taken first, followed by a consultation with the oncologist, then they'll make up my chemotherapy cocktail for me.

I had my blood taken and as usual my veins disappeared when the needle went anywhere near my arm. After two failed attempts, they brought in the expert blood removal man** THANK GOD! I'm now nursing a few bruises. I also had an ECG today and I'm still ticking.

There's a question mark hanging over Monday. One of my scars has not healed!!!!!! I'll see the consultant on Monday and he will make the decision as to whether I can have chemo or not. This is so frustrating as I just want to get on with it.

Wish me luck x

** male nurse with brightly coloured torniquet NOT a vampire!

M on W day 24 - Mme Ray

Mme Ray to the rescue with lashings of comfort food. My back 'went' today and I've been in absolute agony. Mme Ray works at the Osteopaths and was obviously aware of my plight. She has delivered the most comforting dish of sausage and mash with gravy and veg. Delicious!!!!
Bless you Mme Ray, you're my heroine xxxxxx

M on W day 24 - Mrs Riches

Hey hey look what I found on the doorstep from the the Queen of cupcakes. they are absolutely fantastic........obviously calorie-free? And I loved the little cheesie puffs. They are VERY addictive.
Kids are now squabbling over the cakes. Oi kids, they're mine!!!!!!!!
Thanks Mrs R, they are so lovely xxxxx

M on W day 23 - Mrs Beadle

Thank you for popping in and giving me a very thoughtful gift (And it was delivered in the tastiest bag too ;-) )
I know that you've had a nightmare with your kitchen re-build, so this really is very sweet of you. I'll pop down for a panini when I'm feeling up to it.
Thanks Mrs B xxx

Ps Happy Birthday to Mr B (for yesterday)

I love this

Do you think I could crochet one of these at the
'stitchin & b****in' evenings?
Isn't it fab?

ladies and gentlemen

Lewes with Lizzie

As part of my therapy, lovely Mole took us to Lewes. This is our little 6 monthly treat. We both love the fact that it's not 'high street' and it's full of knick and knack shops (as my husband refers to the places I like).
Skinny lattes at skinny Liz's and shopping in Wickle, what more could a girl ask for?
Thanks Mole it was the best medicine ever ............can't wait till October!

Love/Hate

This made me smile when Mr postie delivered it.
I'm a marmite lover.

The onion

Just a quick update - my chemo now starts on the 15th March. This means I have another week in which to eat more cake and drink lots more tea x

Sunday funday

I am so very proud of my Cheesie boys. They ran in the Berkhamsted 5 mile fun run. Mr Cheese didn't let his bad leg stop him entering into the spirit of things (and he SO wanted to beat his son too). He came in at 45 mins and my large haired eldest came in at an amazing 50 mins (not bad considering he and master VW stopped to do their laces up several times and also answer the call of nature). Well done both of you, I'm very proud xxxxxxxxx

Our large haired eldest also attended the Hertfordshire School Sing Up at the Royal Albert Hall. It was a fabulous night, and they were a credit to their school. And from where we were sitting I think everyone remembered their words. Well done all, especially my boy (who is now very hoarse and very tired). XXXXX

ps a special mention to Mrs Riches, Mrs Bowen & Andrew for running the half marathon and Mrs Ray for the 5 mile, in aid of the 'food for thought' project at Kyabirwa school in Uganda (£7 will provide a porridge lunch for a primary school child for a whole year. Most of these children only get 1 meal a day, 6 hours sleep and have to walk a 12 mile round trip to school)
Well done guys, you did an amazing thing xxxxxx

For anyone wishing to donate to these worthy causes here are the links - thank you x

Berko astro pitch project (the cheesie donation page)

Kyabirwa school project (the Greenway school association donation page)

The Gruffalo

Today I went to see my lovely little friend in his school assembly. It was a wonderful presentation of The Gruffalo. It always leaves me tearful when watching very small people perform in front a huge crowd of eager parents. Of course, unless you get there 3 hours before (or sleep overnight outside the school gates) you never can get a seat. Some people must have been there at the crack of dawn. Mole and I stood to the side and watched, wiping a tear away here and there. It was a nice way to start a friday morning and a HUGE HUGE thank you to lovely Master F. I loved watching you and I especially liked the special mention I got in the middle of the play. Love you xxxxxx

Dorset Cereals

Hey, even though I came 2nd (no mean feat considering you were only voting for me for less than a week) the lovely people at Dorset Cereals have kindly sent a box of goodies. YUM!!!!!
They all look delicious and I can't decide which to try first.
Thanks everyone x x x

friday fun

A little bit of friday fun. I'm a 'Creator', phew thank goodness for that!!!!!!
http://www.careerpath.com

The onion

Today I'm back in hospital. I see the nurse first and then it's a 3 1/2 hour discussion and chat with fellow patients. Thank goodness there will be a coffee and biscuit break as I don't think I'll be able to concentrate for that long. My notebook and pencil are in my bag. I'm really not sure what to expect.
Mrs Twelly will be my driver for the day. I'm looking forward to seeing her, thank you Mrs T xxx

red

things around the house................

HaPpY sT dAvID's dAy

Lovely Mari-the-cake, left delicious welsh cakes and daffodils as it's St David's day.
The cheesie boy has eaten 3 (must be his welsh roots).

DIOLCH YN FAWR I CHI CARIAD xxxxx